Fame, Fan or Friend

Fill their faces with shame; that they may seek your name, O LORD. (Psalms 83:16)

David is praying about God's enemies in this chapter of Psalms.  When I initially read this verse, I thought it was good that David wanted these enemies to know God, even if it came via shame.  Then I realized that seeking God's name is not the same as seeking God.  The Hebrew word translated "name" in this verse means "reputation, fame, glory."  Seeking God's name is impersonal -- more knowing what He does than than knowing who He is.

I look at it this way.  When it comes to famous people, there are different levels of knowing them. I live near the hometown of David Cook, season 7 winner of American Idol.  This was a very big deal in our metro area.  Some local people may not know who he is but I would say the vast majority of people here are at least familiar with his name.  I would break it down like this:

Fame Level:  I know who he is.  I know the name.  I know he won.  I appreciate his accomplishment.

Fan Level:  Many Idol fans know details about his life.  They followed his journey to, through and beyond American Idol.  They appreciate his story.

Friend Level:  I know at least two people who are related to David.  They know him.  He knows them.  They have a relationship with him.  They have traveled with him.  They appreciate him. 

How well do you know God -- fame, fan or friend?

If you desire friend level, it will help if you:
--Seek Him.
--Seek His face.
--Seek His strength.
--Seek His kingdom.
--Seek His voice.

Daniel "set his face unto the Lord God and sought him by prayer and supplication with fasting and sackcloth and ashes."  That is some serious seeking. 

But serious seeking has serious benefits...You will seek me, and find me, when you search for me with all your heart. (Jeremiah 29:13)

That is seeker friendly.  Go for it!

Bitter Waters

When God delivered the Israelites from their slavery in Egypt, He did so in a mighty way.  His power was demonstrated to them repeatedly while he granted the freedom they longed for.  One of the first tests the people faced after they had complete separation from the pursuing Egyptian army involved three days in the wilderness with no water.  When they finally came to water, they could not drink it because it was bitter.  They murmured.  I probably would have, too.  Why did God bring us here for this?  What now?

There are some parallels between this story and my current season of life.  I have prayed for years for a certain heart desire to be granted.  My previous circumstances were not unbearable.  I was content, but I continued to bring this desire before God from time to time.  He recently granted that longing to me, but it came in a rather unpleasant way. While I am enjoying my new-found freedom, there are aspects of it that are uncomfortable, potentially bitter.  My temptation is to question, why did you bring me here?  What now?

The solution for the bitter waters of Marah was a certain tree that God showed Moses.  God recently showed me a tree as well.  I found it in Psalms 69, a passage that foretells Jesus' sacrifice on a tree.   I have read this before but on this reading God cast the cross deep into the waters of my heart.  He revealed to me His love on a deeper level than I had previously seen it as I read phrases like, "my foolishness...my sins are not hid from thee" and words like "reproach, shame and dishonor."  It gripped my heart as I better understood the truth of "He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us."   The verse that sweetened the waters of my heart the most was, "They that hate me without a cause are more than the hairs of my head: they that would destroy me, being my enemies wrongfully, are mighty: then I restored that which I took not away."  He didn't have to do that.

Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

Scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet perhaps for a good man some would even dare to die.  But God demonstrates his love toward us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

A God who will endure such for me loves me in a way I just can't quite wrap my mind around.  He loves you, too.  His ways are perfect, even when we don't see the big picture. I know that because of his love.  I will fix my eyes on the power he has demonstrated in my past and I will set my heart on his unfathomable love.

A closing thought "This is my commandment, That you love one another, as I have loved you."  But that's another blog...

The Secret Place of Thunder

Then came there a voice from heaven, saying, I have both glorified it (my name), and will glorify it again. The people that stood by, and heard it, said that it thundered: others said, An angel spake to him.

God's voice is frequently described as thunder, and I came away from a cursory look at this word in the Bible in a state I struggle to define.  I am elated at the various references to thunder.  They are both powerful and personal.  They convey messages of fear and freedom.  As I looked at each reference I felt like I was waiting to ride an unfamiliar roller coaster.  I love roller coasters and my heart literally pounded in anticipation of the ride ahead.  I know there will be many surprise turns and dips as I continue this ride.  My brief study today left me in a whirlwind of thought.  I admit, I took the "chicken exit" to catch my breath on this first attempt to ride.

Before I exited, however, I found an interesting thunder reference in Psalms 81:7,  "You called in trouble, and I delivered you; I answered you in the secret place of thunder."  At first glance, "secret place" and "thunder" seem incompatible in nature.  Thunder is hard to keep secret.  Hang on...
 
2 Samuel 22:14 says, "The Lord thundered from heaven, and the most High uttered his voice."  Two verses before that we learn that God made darkness pavilions around him.  That word "pavilions" means "thicket, covert, booth."  Sounds a lot like a secret place. 
 

Interestingly, the verse between the darkness verse and and thunder verse talks about brightness.  "Through the brightness that was before him were coals of fire kindled."  So I picture something like this:

 

The brightness that emanates from God kindles coals of fire.  A few uses for coals in scripture:

*sacrifice

*refining

*judgment
*cooking

 

When I attempt to put all these thoughts together, I think one small piece we can place in God's thunder puzzle is that it can be a secret place where God speaks into our lives.  That particular secret place is shrouded in darkness.  You know, those dark times in our lives marked by groping in search of Divine help.  If we continue stepping through that darkness, squelching our fears and other "voices of reason," God does bring illumination to our darkness.  Generally, that light highlights a need we have to address to dispel the darkness. Perhaps it involves an area of sacrifice; perhaps refining our mission or motives; perhaps our judgment of others or a situation is incorrect; or we may need to righteously judge an aspect of our lives.  Always, God desires to nourish our spirit.   My personal experience has been that the needs I perceive in the darkness often do not resemble the revealed needs at all.  Other times, the revealed need is a three-dimensional version of my original concept.  In either case, this Divine disclosure, if acted upon, brings Divine deliverance.

 

Maybe there is darkness in your life.  Maybe the darkness is only noticeable from certain angles.  Or maybe the darkness is all-encompassing.  Rather than freezing in fear, I urge you to walk through that wall of darkness as you cry out to God.  He will answer you.  Follow the sound of His thunder and allow Him to illuminate your needs. Then walk in the light. 

Security Threat (Part 2)

Many of the Jews...came not for Jesus sake only, but that they might see Lazarus also, whom Jesus had raised from the dead. But the chief priests consulted that they might put Lazarus to death also; for because of him many of the Jews went away and believed on Jesus. (Taken from John 12:9-11)

The chief priests were threatened by Jesus.  We discussed that in part 1.  Jesus threatened their "place" and their "nation."  He does that to us, too.

Jesus also threatened the security of the high priests via Lazarus.  It was really no fault of his own. Lazarus had no say in this situation.  He was, after all, dead when it was instigated.  He was simply a man Jesus loved who had died.  Jesus chose to bring him back to life in plain view of several people.  Some of those people told the Jewish religious leaders who then threatened Lazarus' security.  Simply put, Lazarus died, Jesus raised him and some pretty powerful people wanted him dead again.  John does not tell us specifically what Lazarus' reaction was to being the subject of a miracle and the target of a death threat was.  I like to think because Jesus loved him, and he loved Jesus, he was elated about the miracle and didn't mind the threat.

But the truth is, Lazarus apparently did not have a choice.  We do.  When we choose to follow Jesus, we choose more than life.  We choose death.  Jesus put it this way, "If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brothers, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple...whoever forsakes not all that he has cannot be my disciple." 

Tough words.

Tough questions.

*Am I willing to be separated from my father?
*Am I willing to be separated from my mother?
*Am I willing to be separated from my spouse?
*Am I willing to be separated from my children?
*Am I willing to be separated from my brothers?
*Am I willing to be separated from my sisters.
*Am I willing to be separated from my life?
*Am I willing to be separated from all that I have?

This commitment goes deeper than the places we build and the positions we hold.  This commitment encompasses everything in our lives that has previously defined who we are and why we exist.  It is not supposed to be easy. 

Jesus himself struggled with the sacrifice that was asked of him, "Now is my soul troubled; and what shall I say? Father, save me from this hour."  But, Jesus understood perfectly why he must make the sacrifice, "but for this cause came I unto this hour. Father, glorify your name."

Jesus asks us to struggle and ultimately commit. "Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abides alone: but if it die, it brings forth much fruit. He that loves his life shall lose it; and he that hates his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal."

Lazarus seemingly did not have a choice.  You do.  I do.  Are you 100% willing for Jesus to threaten your highest security level?  Am I?   

Ask tough questions.  Give real answers.  Ask for grace.  Go for Jesus.  All things are possible with God.

Forgiveness....again

I can of my own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just; because I seek not my own will, but the will of the Father who has sent me. - Jesus

John 5 nails it - the heart of walking out this Christian life.  From the beginning of his ministry all the way to the garden of Gethsemane, Jesus' walk reflects actions born out of judgments made according to God's will.  That is why His ministry was so radical.  That is why much of what He did was strongly opposed by the religious leaders.  Jesus' spirit was tuned in to God's Spirit.  Religious leaders' spirits were tuned into themselves.  Their way created a righteous-looking, societal-acceptable path that ultimately appealed to man's will -- a highly desirable path by many but completely unattainable for most.  God's will leads down a path may not always look righteous -- on first glance.  God's will leads down a path that may not always -- even rarely -- be societal-acceptable.  God's will leads to a path that will challenge every motive of every judgment we act upon.  God's will leads to a path that may not be desirable by many but it is completely attainable by all.  Therefore, my strongest efforts must be made to know God and to learn to hear His judgments - his will unhindered by my will.

My blog title says this writing is about forgiveness.  It is. In the garden of Gethsemane, Jesus prayed, "Not my will, but thine."  Three times, he expressed his will was not to go to the cross.  Three times he prayed according to God's will.  Then, as he had done many times, he acted upon the Father's will, not his own.  It was because He judged according to the Father's judgment that he asked his Father to forgive them -- "them" being those who had judged him unrighteously; "them" being those who had beaten him unmercifully; "them" being those whose eternal judgment He was suffering; "them" being us...me.  When my spirit is tuned to God's Spirit and my will is submitted to His, I can express His will in every way.  One of the most impactful, radical ways of expressing the Father's will is by forgiving those who would by our own will be impossible to forgive.  With God all things are possible. Be radical.

I Want More

"As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God." Ps 42:1 Over the Christmas and new year's break I had a chance to do a little reading. I picked up a book by A.W. Tozer called The Pursuit of God. I highly recommend it. After I finished that I started reading The Spiritual Man by Watchman Nee. Although I will probably be reading it for the rest of 2012, based on what I have read so far, I highly recommend it as well. I have become aware of the fact that I do not commune with God in the way He designed us to commune with Him. I do okay most mornings when I start my day and have no distractions. But as my day goes on, the demands of work and family life take a front seat and my ability to walk in communion with God is greatly affected. It's not that I am doing wrong things, but that I am not listening to the Spirit of God throughout my day, letting Him drive my day through the Truth He has revealed. I have a "necessary" agenda for the day and my ability to have that interrupted or even interpreted by the Spirit is basically not there.

I heard a man telling the kind of stories all Christian love to hear but few of us experience on a regular basis. The stories were radical and they were real and they were recent. They involved busy people, listening to God, following His instructions, and helping lost souls come to Jesus. This man lives that way consistently. He is a busy, working father of 4 with a life full of potential distractions and he said, "When you learn to do that, it becomes so natural..." That is what I want. I am thirsty for this kind of a continual drink from God. Yes, I love the touches of His Spirit through His word in the mornings. I love when God speaks to me in undeniable ways through other events or circumstances. But what I crave, what I long for more than anything is that daily, moment-by-moment communion of His Spirit with my spirit, directing my thoughts and actions and interactions. I want more! Is that possible? I strongly believe the answer is yes! And I am praying with all my heart that God will move me from where I am now to that point that at this moment seems quite far away!

Ironically, when I was praying about that this morning, my thoughts kept getting distracted by various things. I would pray about something, and then my mind would begin to think on that thing and try to devise solutions or conversations, etc. I became very frustrated that the very thing I was praying for and longing for -- communion with God that is constant in spite of life's distractions -- was becoming quite the battle during that very prayer. I cried out to God for help and suddenly, I had a memory of an event that happened a few summers ago. I think I blogged about it at the time. It happened on a day when Josh was in China and Mikiah was busy with an activity. I decided to take Judson to the swimming pool. He did not know how to swim yet and he had a good, healthy fear of the water, usually stayed pretty close to the edge. While we were there, I received a call from my sister. She was on her way to the hospital because my mom had just been admitted. Mom was pretty sick and as it turns out, this was the beginning of her final stay in the hospital before she passed away. As we were talking, my sister suddenly said she had to get off the phone because the tornado sirens were going off and she was driving -- she needed to find a safe place. She hung up. I was miles from mom or my sister and was completely helpless to assist either one of them. Obviously I was a little upset. I glanced back toward the pool to find Judson and began to panic as I did not immediately see him. Surely, the little boy bobbing up and down in the water was not him. He was, after all, surrounded by other swimmers. The swimmer next to him was just staring at him and the lifeguard was just staring at him, so it must just be a kid playing. If he was in serious trouble, all those people watching would be moving to help him, right? Wrong! That kid was not playing. That kid was my little boy and he was desperately trying to keep from drowning while others just stared at him and while I was distracted by some very serious distractions! It turned out okay but it was a scary moment and a horrible sight I will likely always remember. As that memory flooded my mind this morning, God spoke to my heart. Life will always have distractions and demands that scream for attention. In the midst of those, I must have His eyes to see all the drowning souls around me. I must let Him guide my eyes, my thoughts, my energies. Sure, there are things I have to do as a responsible wife, mother and worker -- things I love to do and want to do. But God must be in the driver's seat every day, even in the midst of those demands. He must be able to interrupt me at any given moment and open my eyes to the needs around me. How many drowning souls have I stood next to, completely unaware of their peril? Or worse, how often have I just assumed someone else would rescue them? God, give me grace to let go of my life and cling to yours! Give me your eyes, ears, hands, feet and heart that your desires are lived out in my life.

What Seek Ye?

In Genesis 37:15, Joseph's father had asked him to go find his brothers and bring him a report as to how they were doing with the flocks. The verse says, "And a certain main found him, and behold, he was wandering in the field: and the man asked him, saying, What seekest thou?" The Hebrew word translated "wandering" in this verse means "to err, go astray, stagger". Joseph thought his brothers were in one field when in reality they had moved to another location. Even though he had gone to the location his father told him, he suddenly found himself in the wrong place to accomplish his stated mission. It took a "certain man" asking a pointed question to get him back to the right field.

We can speculate over the passage, but we don't know Joseph's motives. The fact is, we can get off of the path to accomplish our stated mission for a multitude of reasons. The bottom line is, will we heed the words of a "certain man" in our lives who points us in the direction we need to go? What seekest thou?

Jesus asked this very question of two men who would become his disciples. They had heard about him and began to follow him when he passed by. John 1:38 tells us Jesus' response to their action, "Then Jesus turned, and saw them following, and said to them, What seek ye? They said unto him, Rabbi...where dwellest thou?" They wanted to know where Jesus lived. They wanted a more personal relationship with him.

Pharaoh, a picture of one who has all the "good things" in life, asked Hadad an interesting question in I Kings 11:22, "What have you lacked with me that you seek to go to your own country?" This is a question we may pose in our own minds when God is asking us to seek Him in a different place. Perhaps he wants us in a different field in order to know Him more. Maybe changing fields is uncomfortable. Maybe the current field in which we are wandering is comfortable and offers the opportunity to "lack nothing" physically, but is God there? Are we seeking him in the right place?

So I leave you with this admonition from Jesus in Luke 12:29, 31 "Seek not what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink, neither be ye of doubtful mind...but seek ye first the kingdom of God."

The somewhat cliche Christmas saying is applicable...wise men do still seek him.

A Tribute to the Severely Abused

This is a tribute speech I wrote in honor of the brave souls who have been severely abused. If this is you and you have made, are making, or are considering making the journey to wholeness and healing, I salute you and admire you more than I can express. It is with admittedly limited understanding that I attempt this tribute but my intentions are to honor you and to share with any and all who will hear that God is a God of healing. Only God can turn what Satan meant for evil into a beautiful work of goodness -- a trophy, if you will. This is for you...
-----------------------
Imagine you discover your most precious possession has been stolen and taken to a distant place.

Imagine you desire to regain what is rightfully yours but learn the journey will be fraught with danger.

Imagine fear greater than any you have ever experienced versus desire beyond your ability to articulate. A battle ensues. Desire wins.

You procure an experienced partner to help guide you on the journey ahead. She prepares you as best she can, warning you it will not be easy but encouraging you that others have successfully made this trip. And so, with tempered reluctance, you begin your journey.

At the outset, you are surprised to learn your precious possession has been traumatically fractured into multiple pieces and fragments have been scattered all along the road to your destination. You decide you must find every piece and carefully reassemble them. But when you attempt to retrieve a part, you discover it is heavily guarded by a host of enemies. Fear freezes you briefly but desire drives you forward. You soon learn that with some effort, the enemies will become allies and join your endeavor to gather and guard the pieces. You find each retrieval more challenging than the previous, each enemy requiring more and more effort to win over. Fear frequently tempts you to turn back, but desire drives you forward. Days turn into weeks and weeks into months. And then one day you arrive. You have only one piece to place before your precious possession is once again complete.

But what if it isn’t what you remember it being? The journey has changed you. What if your desire is disappointed? Fear freezes you again - briefly. Then you breathe deeply and prepare to place the final piece.

It has been said that “courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.” (Ambrose Redmoon)

You are about to meet the courageous traveler in this story. Her journey represents restoration to wholeness from dissociated identity disorder (formerly known as multiple personality disorder). It resulted from countless episodes of ritualistic abuse from infancy through adolescence by her own father and other family members. Thus, her journey. Her journey, however, did not end at restoration. In fact, in many ways it was just beginning. She then bravely forged ahead with a vision to turn her fearful experiences into a fortress for others traveling a similar road, especially children in crisis. This new direction has also been marked by many obstacles and the all-too-familiar battles between fear and desire. Desire won again! When asked where she found the courage to successfully complete these portions of her life’s journey, this traveler answered that it is her relationship with her Heavenly Father, affectionately called Abba, which has enabled her to conquer the roadblocks in her life and turn her pain into a passion to help others. Today we are gathered to celebrate the realization of her vision with the opening of Abba’s Refuge. Ladies and gentleman, it is my great pleasure to introduce to you the founder of Abba’s Refuge....

If you want to learn more about this subject, I highly recommend the book, "Multiple Identities: Understanding and Supporting the Severely Abused" by Diane Hawkins.

The Thief of Unbelief

Hebrews chapters 3-4 recount the story of the Israelites when the time had finally arrived for them to enter into the land God had promised them. They seemed to have both short-term and long-term memory problems. God had demonstrated time and time again His power and His care for them. However, when an obstacle stood in the road on their journey to inherit God's promise, they had a habit of focusing on the impossible-looking situation rather than the God who had delivered them from such "impossibilities" in the past. Because of their unbelief, most of that original group of Israelites died without ever entering into the land God had promised them. (Heb 4:19)

We see a similar situation in Jesus' time on earth, "And he did not many mighty works there because of their unbelief" (Matt 13:58).

I had a dream not long ago. In the dream I was driving my car in a semi-rural setting, on the edge of a town. As time passed, I found myself no longer driving a car, but sitting in a rocking chair that was being propelled by an unseen force down an unfamiliar road in the "middle of nowhere." The road gradually changed from a paved road, to a gravel road to a path. My response was panic. Where was I? I was going to be late! What am I doing in a rocking chair? Naturally, I climbed out of the rocking chair and proceeded to carry the chair. In front of me loomed a rather difficult-looking hill. I knew it would be very hard to carry my rocking chair up that hill so I chose to walk on the flat ground alongside the road. The flat ground contacted the road again on the other side of the hill. At that point, I got back on the road. I heard a car coming up behind me and I fully anticipated the driver would come to me and offer a ride. But, the car turned off the road in a different direction. Eventually, I was forced to climb a hill, still carrying my rocking chair. At the top of the hill, I was faced with three views representing three options. The first was the road behind me. Should I return? I was sure there was someplace I needed to be at a certain time back there... The path beside the road had given way to a beautiful valley with a breathtaking view. I could sit in that chair and enjoy that view for quite some time! The road in front of me also led to a valley. There was a peaceful looking village in that valley complete with a farmer walking out of his house toward his barn. As my gaze continued past the village, I saw a not-as-peaceful looking city. I thought that perhaps I should go to the village and ask the farmer where I was. At that point my dream ended. What was my choice?

I think the rather odd story in my dream depicts our lives as followers of Jesus. We like to drive and be in control. We enjoy speaking of faith and being involved in activities that proclaim faith but when our Unseen Force desires to drive us in an unfamiliar vehicle through unfamiliar territory, we face a strong temptation to climb out the chair and try to regain control. If we succumb to that temptation, we miss the rest and journey that the chair offers! I am moved to tears at the prospect of the promises of God I have forfeited in my life because of my unbelief!

The good news is, God is a God of second chances -- and third, and more. Jesus often reprimanded his disciples for their unbelief. Yet, after they were empowered by the Holy Spirit to understand, believe and walk in the Truth, they became pillars of faith. They ultimately did get on right road. If we get off of our God-given path, it is not too late to get back on if we will get back in the chair!

I believe in my dream I missed some of the beauty and rewards of the road when I chose the "easy" path. I really had no choice other than to take the flat path because I was carrying my heavy chair! What did I miss on my journey during the time I was not on the road? We want to be careful not to test God in this area or to take advantage of His grace and mercy when we are aware we are off the road. The Israelites tempted Him numerous times in the wilderness until they finally lost all hope of entering into the promises of God in this life.

What obstacles are in your path? Stay in the chair! "Let us labor therefore to enter into that rest, lest any man fall after the same example of unbelief (Heb 4:11, referring to the Israelites who missed the promises of God). I pray I will no longer allow unbelief to be a thief in my life!

Den of Thieves

My house shall be called a house of prayer; but you have made it a den of thieves. Matthew 21:13.

A house of prayer is nothing less than a place set aside for the purpose of communing with God. Spiritually, our bodies are the temple of God (I Corinthians 3:16). We commune with God via His Spirit that dwells in us. The evidence of that communion is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance. (Galatians 5:22-23) The question then would be, do I have that evidence? If not, why not?

I find it interesting that it was the religious folks that made God's house a den of thieves, rendering it useless as a house of prayer. I think Christians should take note of this and examine ourselves closely. We need to ask hard questions. Do I have love like Jesus does? Do I have joy, real joy? Do I have peace that passes all understanding? And on down the list. I believe the most frequent thief in our temples is not "obvious sin". Consider. Do thieves operate that way? Rather, I believe the most common thief comes disguised in a cloak of "good" that supports religious practices. Wasn't that the case in the temple? Those money changers were simply trying to make it easier for the folks to make their sacrifices. How thoughtful.

Do you find that you hate mankind rather than love? Perhaps your religion and good intentions are unknowingly creating a judgemental spirit rather than a God-driven passion to love sinners into His kingdom.

When you dig deep into your heart and soul, is there a pool of misery rather than a fountain of living water and joy? Perhaps again, strict adherence to seemingly sound scriptural teachings are clogging up the works. Jesus is freedom and inexplicable joy.

Has peace escaped you? Maybe religion has stolen your hope for the miraculous to impact your life daily.

Do you tend to be impatient? Harsh? Have a hard time doing good for those who don't deserve it? Is your faith limitless? Why not? Are you too proud of and busy practing your high moral standards to experience God's power? Do you have temperance in ALL things?

These are hard, hard questions and I suspect that each and every one of us can stand a clean-up and tune-up in this area. Sometimes it can be painful to take that honest look but just imagine if our "temples" operated the way God intends them to operate? Could people then say of the us that these Christians turned the world upside down? I suspect so. Let's get honest and get to God's business. I want to pray a simple yet challenging prayer asking God to reveal the areas in my temple that steal from his house of prayer. Will you join me?

The Ultimate Love Dare

In Matthew 10:31-38, Jesus challenges his followers with this, "Whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my father which is in heaven. Think not I come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace but a sword...a man's foes shall be they of his own household...and he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me."

Matthew 5:44, "Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you and pray for them which despitefully use you and persecute you."

The Ultimate Love Dare is This:

1. Do I love Jesus enough to pick up this cross of division and follow him?

2. Do I love Jesus enough to obey his command in Matthew 5:44 regarding these foes?

1. Love: to feel and exhibit esteem and gratitude to a person, to prize and delight in a thing. The etymology of this word is commonly understood properly to denote love based on esteem as distinct from that expressed by "amo", spontaneous, natural affection. In other words, this is dutiful love and it cannot be faked. It is a command.

2. Bless: to praise, celebrate with praises; to invoke blessing; to consecrate a thing with solemn prayers. It is a command.

3. Do Good: To perform beautifully, finely, excellently, well -- no reason for blame. It is a command.

4. Pray: Present tense, voice almost always translated as active and it is an imperative. It is a command.

It is God who works in us both to will and to do his good pleasure. (Philippians 2:13). Do your work in me, God! Conform me to your image and make me a willing, obedient child to accept with joy your love dare. Amen!

Unbelievable!

Mark 16 gives the account of Jesus' resurrection. Perhaps the most disturbing verse of this chapter is verse 14, "Afterward he appeared unto the eleven as they sat at meat and upbraided them with their unbelief and hardness of heart, because they believed not them which had seen him after he was risen." Before Jesus' arrest and crucifixion, he had tried to prepare the disciples for this time. He frankly spoke of the events surrounding the his death and resurrection. He even took three of them up to a mountain where they witnessed his transfiguration and saw Moses and Elijah, all proof of the truth of resurrection. Yet they did not understand. These truths Jesus revealed were uncommon. They definitely did not fit in their "boxes" of understanding. Nor would it have fit in ours.

The last verses of Mark 16, verses 15-20, give account of Jesus' charge to the disciples to go and tell, preach the good news of Jesus to everyone. Jesus told them that those who believe and are baptized will be saved but those who are not will be damned. Another difficult truth.

He also says that "these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues; They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them: they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover." Then a couple of verses later, "And they went forth, and preached every where, the Lord working with them, and confirming the word with signs following."

In our current day, it is not difficult for us to believe the crucifixion and resurrection. We have the perspective of history and scripture to help us understand and believe these things. I find it interesting that right after Jesus gets on the disciples for not believing he had risen from the dead, he begins to tell them about the signs and wonders that will follow "them who believe." The disciples had no problem believing that. They had already seen these signs and wonders. And now they were actually speaking to the risen Jesus. They believed what he said, obeyed by preaching the word and God confirmed His word with signs.

I have heard this passage explained away many times. I have heard pastors and teachers say that we should not expect signs and wonders in our day because those were just for this specific time in history. However, when I read this passage, I really don't see that. As a matter of fact, I don't see that teaching anywhere in the Bible. God is powerful. God's word is powerful. We have this treasure in our "earthen vessels" so that others can see His power through us and glorify Him (2 Corinthians 4). So why do we try to explain these verses away? What are we afraid of? Yes, there are those who misuse "signs and wonders" just as there are those who misuse all manner of scripture for their own benefit or to suit their own comfort level. But misuse does not negate truth.

I believe if Jesus were to walk into our midst today, he would upbraid us with our unbelief and hardness of heart. We need to pause before we criticize the disciples for their unbelief at something that seems so obviously believable to us. Contemplate this: do I walk in unbelief at the obvious teachings of God's word? Do I read it for the truth it contains or do I try to make it fit within my comfort zone? God confirms His word with power. Do I allow Him to do that in my experience? God, help thou my unbelief!

On Forgiveness

"And when you stand praying, forgive, if you have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses" Mark 11:25-26

I was looking for an "out" regarding the whole praying and forgiveness issue and I was thinking it would be okay to pray sitting, or even better kneeling or prostrate. Then I discovered the meaning of the word stand as it is used in this passage. It is translated from the Greek word steko which means, "to stand firm; to persevere, to persist; to keep one's standing". Then I thought of Psalms 66:18, "If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me." Could it be that unforgiveness counts as iniquity in my heart? Jesus absolutely forbids unforgiveness. Certainly, a true Christian will not lose their standing as a child of God or their access to God, but the Bible is very clear that there are things that cut off communication with our Father.

Are you persevering and standing firm in prayer? Do you feel as though God does not hear those prayers or answer those prayers you have been praying for weeks, months or even years? I know I have some of those. There can be several reasons for that, but I think it would serve us well to investigate the possibility of unforgiveness and bitterness in our hearts. On a very personal note, I have recently been surprised at some of the ugliness that has been revealed in my heart. Certain events in my life have pried open the mouth of a concealed well of bitterness and anger so that those rivers of living water are competing with, well, sewer water! Yuck.

This morning as I was praying about how in the world to have complete victory over unforgiveness, a verse came to mind. "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." Those were the words of Jesus as he hung on the cross. He uttered these words after being unjustly and severely beaten, mocked, humiliated and AS he was enduring a most painful form of death. I have previously realized that I have no right to hold unforgiveness in my heart if perfect Jesus forgives all things and endured all that he did. That in itself is a huge motivation for forgiveness. But apparently I need more motivation as I continue to struggle with "repeat offenders," especially those offenses that deeply hurt.

This morning when that verse came to mind, it begged a different question. Rather than the usual, how do I have the right to hold unforgiveness in my heart, it was the question of how could Jesus say they didn't know what they were doing? Of course they knew. They knew he was a just man. In all likelihood, many of them knew who he really was, their Messiah. They knew he did not deserve death. They knew they beat him and mocked him and humiliated him and crucified him unjustly. They absolutely knew what they were doing. Yet Jesus said they did not.

Jesus understood better than any could that the events of those days were fueled by a cosmic battle, a struggle so huge that the majority of the fight could not and would not be observed by the human eye. He understood that the people who hated him and acted so harshly on that hate were driven by unseen forces in the most intense battle of Good versus Evil. "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood." (Ephesians 6) I believe Jesus could look at them and have compassion on them because he understood this intense battle and its effect on them and because he knew who they were apart from the sin that had them in its grip as a result of that battle.

And so it is with us. It is true we have no right to hold unforgiveness. There are, however, in each of our lives those situations that demand we continually revisit this issue of forgiveness. It is those repeat offenses that produce deep pain that result in deep and sometimes hidden wells of unforgiveness and bitterness despite our best attempts to cut off the supply to those wells. What are we to do with that? How can we pray effectively and run the race unencumbered by the "weight and sin"? I defer to my life verse, "With man this is impossible but with God all things are possible." The Bible says it is God who works in us both to will and to do his good pleasure.

So here is my prayer. God, work in me both to will and to do what you have shown me about forgiveness. Not only do I need to relinquish my perceived right to be offended, but I need to understand the offenders as Jesus understood his offenders. Help me be able to honestly say, "Father, forgive _________, for they know not what they do." And may others find the grace to say the same of me when I am the offender.

Amazing Vision, Petrifying Path

It's hard to say how many times I have started a project with intense excitement in terms of the goal and then quickly became overwhelmed at the enormity of actually carrying out of the steps to reach that goal. Sometimes I determine the project is not worth pursuing and other times I persevere because I really, really want to reach that goal. I believe this is a fairly common human experience.

I am intrigued by Mark 10:32, "And they were in the way going up to Jerusalem; and Jesus went before them: and they were amazed; and as they followed, they were afraid. And he took again the twelve, and began to tell them what things should happen unto him."

Did you notice that? When Jesus began to lead them, they were amazed. The word amazed has a flavor of fear intermixed with wonder and awe. What happened as they began to actually follow Jesus' leading? They were afraid. In the Greek, the word translated afraid actually means "to put to flight by terrifying (to scare away)". In the context of this passage, the disciples were probably starting to understand why they were going to Jerusalem. They were beginning to see that this was not a pleasure trip. It was, however, a most necessary part of God's plan for mankind. There is much we can learn from this verse.

There have been times I have embarked on a new journey in my spiritual walk. Often my initial approach is one of amazement -- fear, awe, wonder. But as I walk it out, there are generally moments of indescribable fear. Times I cry out to God, "Did I understand you correctly? Is that really you up ahead on this path?" At times I am paralyzed with fear and stop dead in my tracks. Thankfully, though, God encourages my lead feet to follow his lead and as the path becomes more clear, the fear dissipates, purpose becomes evident and joy overtakes fear. Notice I did not say the path becomes easier. I said it becomes more clear. Its purpose is evident and it is of eternal value. Let us encourage one another to continue the journey. Let us be motivated to listen to our Leader as He coaxes us through those fears and leads us on our perfect path. Have you left the path? Meet Him there again. He so desires us to follow.

As a Little Child

Consider this verse in Mark 10, "Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein." Did you catch that? We MUST receive the kingdom of God as a child. We WILL NOT enter in otherwise. We don't often talk about the straight and narrow road or Jesus' teaching on that fact that few will enter in. Rarely do I hear teaching or preaching on receiving God's kingdom as a child. Often the focus of the teaching on this portion of the gospel is on our need to love and invest in our children. That is definitely important, but we tend to pass right over the fact that we are instructed very specifically by Jesus to accept God's kingdom as a child. One of the definitions of the word "child" in Strong's Online Bible is "metaphorically children in intellect". Of course, this is the only way an adult can do anything as a child. We cannot physically become a child. Does this mean we have "blind faith"? Absolutely not. Children do not blindly accept most things. If you have a child, you know that. You understand the thousands of "whys" that proceed out of the mouth of a child. What it does mean is that we approach God on the platform of belief, understanding He is Truth. It is from there we make our inquiries and seek to understand. It is in that stance, as a curious child whose understanding of life is incomplete, that we grow in our understanding of truth and our ability to grasp the concepts of faith. The Bible specifically says that God uses the foolish things of the world to confound the wise. It specifically teaches that God doesn't think like we think. He does not work like we work. His ways are higher and better. When we seek Him with our man-made intellect, he does not make sense. If we continue to seek him in that fashion, we will eventually grow weary of this God and choose a wider path that will indeed lead to destruction. But, if we approach him as a child, marvelous things await. Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor has entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for them that love him. Believe. You will be continually amazed!

Just in Time

I love the story of the mount of transfiguration, which happens to be what I was reading this morning in Mark 9. I usually get a chuckle out of Peter's response because it's just such a typical human response to an awkward situation. Let me back up.

In this story, Jesus asked Peter, James and John to go with him up to a high mountain, away from everyone else. Here, these three disciples had the amazing experience of seeing Jesus transformed from his earthly body in his heavenly form, "..and he was transfigured before them, and his raiment became shining, exceeding white as snow; so as no fuller on earth can white them". As if that wasn't enough, "and there appeared unto them Eilias (Elijah) and Moses: and they were talking to Jesus".

Don't just glitz over this. Maybe you have heard this story a thousand times, but think about this. Can you just imagine? Wow! What an experience. If this didn't prove Jesus, nothing would. If this didn't prove resurrection, nothing would. What would my response have been? It's hard to say. I suspect I would have been perhaps speechless and in a dead faint; or if I managed to stay on my feet, I may have eventually felt compelled to some sort of action as Peter did. He surmised it was good for them to be there and then suggested they build three tabernacles -- one for Jesus, one for Elias and one for Moses. Brilliant! He was afraid. And I would have been as well.

This was an amazing revelation Jesus gave them to prepare them for his coming death and subsequent resurrection. They would need the assurance of who Jesus is as well as the assurance of the resurrection to give them hope during the dark hours between Jesus' death and resurrection. But, at the moment of the revelation, they really didn't know what to do with it.

As I read this account this morning, I started to recall some specific things God has revealed to me over the years. Often He has re-taught me a truth that struck me in a deeper or slightly different way than it had before. Often, those truths were in direct preparation for an upcoming situation in my life. Those are sweet, intimate times with my Father.

I also thought of how often my strongest desire is to take that revelation and act on it immediately. I become like Peter...since I have this great truth now, I must DO something about it. And then my flesh takes over and if I don't heed the "whoa" of the Holy Spirit, I can create one huge mess! Lesson -- wait on God. He is precious to prepare us and we must remember that it is sometimes days, weeks, months or even years before that piece of preparation finds its proper place in the puzzle of our life.

Eight the Great

I love the book of Mark. I don't know if I have ever heard anyone say that Mark is their favorite gospel, but I do have a tendency toward the abnormal... What I love about Mark is the glimpse it gives us into how Jesus felt when he encountered a variety of individuals in an array of situations. He felt compassion, love, anger, frustration -- the whole realm of emotions we each experience. This blog entry is just a synopsis of some things I learned from Mark chapter 8 in this read through.

Verses 1-9 tell the story of Jesus feeding about 4000 people with 7 loaves of bread and a few small fishes. What I found interesting is that the people were not asking for food. They had been seeking Jesus and feasting on his words for 3 days. Before Jesus sent them on their way, he had compassion on their physical needs and performed a with-man-this-is-impossible-but-with-God-all-things-are-possible act in order to meet their needs. It was easy for Jesus to provide for them physically. It was his desire to provide for them physically. He did it out of compassion. He did it, too, because they sought him. Oh that my focus would be Jesus alone!

Verses 10-13 Jesus encounters the Pharisees. They, too, were seeking Jesus but their motives were all wrong. They were tempting him and trying to find error with Jesus. They were seeking reasons to support their unbelief. They asked Jesus for a sign. Jesus refused. We know he was capable of showing them a sign. He just performed an amazing miracle in the previous verses. In the previous chapters, the Pharisees themselves had either witnessed or at least surely heard of all the miracles that Jesus did. Seeking Jesus out of bitterness and strife is a dead-end street in our spiritual journey.

Verses 14-21 talk about the disciples being paranoid that Jesus was getting on them for forgetting to bring bread on their journey. Jesus starts warning them to beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and their minds immediately go to the physical -- "he knows we forgot to bring bread". Jesus tells them their hearts are hard and reminds them of the miracle they just witnessed. He asks them how they could possible not understand. This part really steps on my toes right now -- ouch! The current circumstances in my life are such that the temptation to focus on the physical is strong. Have I not seen great miracles, even as recently as last week? Do I not remember? Why is it that my mind immediately goes to the physical when Jesus' desire is to teach me a much more profound lesson of the spiritual through my physical circumstances?

Verses 22-26 are interesting because Jesus heals a blind man. But this is different than the other healings we have seen in Mark thus far. This time, the healing takes two touches from Jesus. Why? Was this particular miracle too big to be done in just one touch? Of course not. Remember, we're talking about the one who created everything. The lessons here are undoubtedly many, but the one obvious theme is that God does not work the same way even in similar circumstances -- a consistent truth throughout the Bible. Healings can be instantaneous and healings can take time. Jesus is sovereign. Jesus is omnipotent. He does not fit in my box.

In verses 27-33 Peter declares correctly who Jesus is, "You are the Christ!" Then Peter immediately tries to correct Jesus' teaching on the difficult things that Jesus must soon endure. Oops! Jesus rebukes Peter with harsh words, "Get thee behind me Satan: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but the things that be of men." Ouch! Recognizing Jesus is only the beginning of this journey. Savoring the things of God is a heart matter.

Finally, verses 34-38 are touching really. Sometimes it is easy to fall into condemnation when I see so much of myself reflected in the mess-ups of the disciples. My heart is hard. My faith is small. I don't savor the things of God. I'm a mess! But Jesus loves his disciples. He continues to teach them. They are sometimes quite slow. I am often quite slow. Jesus is full of mercy, love and compassion. He continues to teach. And the teaching here is not a light one. Do I want to follow Jesus? Yes! Take up my cross. Lose my life. Do not be ashamed. Savor this teaching of God! Enter grace.

All Stopped Up and With No Way to Flow

John 7:38-39 He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water. (But this spake he of the Spirit, which they that believe on him should receive: for the Holy Ghost was not yet given; because that Jesus was not yet glorified.)

A year or two ago I spent quite some time studying Ps 51. I was particularly intrigued by verse 6, "Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom." You can read more detail about that in my blog, but the main thing God showed me is that that the inward parts include every little cavity of my inner man. Interestingly, the word "belly" used in John 7 above also means the whole thing, every cavity.

I also learned that the hidden part means "to stop up, shut up and keep closed." I get an image of God pouring His Spirit into me at the time of salvation, much like the top of the waterfall in this picture. However, my river is down to a trickle because of the "rocks" in my inward parts -- those things that are hidden.

At the time God first revealed this truth to me, I prayed earnestly that he would show me anything hidden. I believed those hidden things to be mostly related to sin in my life, and indeed, sin does play a big role in blocking the rivers of living water. However, I am convinced it is more than this.

When the children of Israel were finally allowed out of the wilderness brought on by their sin of unbelief, they were commissioned to go and inhabit a land of abundance promised to them generations before by God Almighty. However, this promised land was already inhabited by enemies, and many of those enemies were very intimidating. Read about their history sometime. You will find that although they did have some amazing victories through God's power, they fell short of complete victory. They did not persevere to conquer all the enemies in their land. Instead, they chose to dwell with them, thinking there was room enough for everyone. Inevitably, this would affect their walk with God and they would fall into sin. This was a pattern in the nation of Israel all throughout the Old Testament. They failed to press on to completely destroy every enemy in the land and thus never fully occupied the promised land.

2 Corinthians 10 says that our battle is not against our flesh but our battle is spiritual. Many of the big sins we think about that might block our flow of living waters are sins of the flesh. Yes, those do need to be removed. But 2 Corinthians 10 says our battle is spiritual and the weapons of our warfare are mighty through the pulling down of strongholds. What is a stronghold? In combat, it is an area of land that actually belongs to one army that has been fortified and occupied by the enemy army. This stronghold may be big or it may be small, but any that is left in place, represents an incomplete occupation and an incomplete victory.

Spiritually speaking, we are in dangerous territory when we allow these strongholds to go unchecked. May I be bold enough to say that I believe a vast majority of true Christ followers do just that? 2 Corinthians 10 talks about casting down imaginations and EVERY high thought that exalts itself against the knowledge of God and bringing EVERY thought into obedience. This is not limited simply to those thoughts we would automatically label "sinful". Hebrews 12 says that we are to lay aside every weight and sin as we patiently run this race. There are weights, rocks, blockages that are not purposeful sin, but that weigh us down in this race and serve to stop the flow of living water.

Satan is the father of lies. Jesus says this in the gospels. In a recent blog I wrote about my "dandelion rejection". From that small incident as a child, I bought into a lie that said I would be rejected when I tried to do something kind for people. From that point until the day I recognized the lie, my behavior flowed from the fear of rejected acts of kindness and I was not even aware of it! Thus, the flow of living water was slowed down. How many other lies are there that block that flow? I suspect a great many!

It is easy for me to understand how children who grow up in abusive or otherwise traumatic environments would have a lot of rocks to remove from their rivers. Unfortunately, I have been very slow to realize that we all receive injuries that lead to lies and ultimately to enemy fortresses in territory that rightfully belongs to God. Thus, the flow is slowed to a mere trickle, a shadow of what it should be if we allowed God to identify and remove the hidden parts from our inward parts.

I know I have mixed metaphors throughout this blog. It is, admittedly, fairly poor form in terms of writing. However, I pray that the readers will take heed to this message. How many otherwise strong, committed believers in Jesus Christ do you know who truly flow with living waters? Personally, I don't know many at all. I know a lot who trickle, myself included. I challenge you to pray a simple prayer and then persevere with God to complete victory, His total occupation of your inward parts. I am praying this prayer...

God, reveal to me the enemy strongholds in your blood-bought territory of my inward parts. Make me to be completely and thoroughly occupied by you so that your rivers of living water may flow from me and refresh all those whose paths you allow my path to cross. I thank you and praise you in advance for doing this work in my life and pray many of your children will arrive at this truth as well.

Let Jesus in Your Ship

John 6:15-21 When Jesus therefore perceived that they would come and take him by force, to make him a king, he departed again into a mountain himself alone. And when even was now come, his disciples went down unto the sea, And entered into a ship, and went over the sea toward Capernaum. And it was now dark, and Jesus was not come to them. And the sea arose by reason of a great wind that blew. So when they had rowed about five and twenty or thirty furlongs, they see Jesus walking on the sea, and drawing nigh unto the ship: and they were afraid. But he saith unto them, It is I; be not afraid. Then they willingly received him into the ship: and immediately the ship was at the land whither they went.

As I was grappling with the Holy Spirit last night regarding some unfamiliar waters in which I find myself, He led me to this passage in John. He reminded me He has control over my unfamiliar waters, asked me to recognize him in them, and showed me not to fear. He challenged me to willingly accept him into my life's boat tossed about in the waters for the purpose of arriving in the place He wishes me to go. Praise God!

What waters do you find yourself in today? Will you willingly let Jesus into your vessel? He has a destination for you! Life and it's storms are not random.

Examine Yourselves

I Peter 1:15-16: As he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation; Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy.

Recently, as I look at the concept of being holy, and I couple that command with the words of 2 Corinthians 13:5, "Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith," I am overwhelmed with a desire to do just that. My prayer today, and hopefully every day from hence forth, is that God will show me any "manner of conversation" in my life that is not holy. I have a strong desire for a deeper understanding of holiness. I know we cannot be seen by God as holy except through the blood of Jesus. I understand that doctrine. But I also see God commanding us to live holy lives. This is not conforming to a set of rules set forth by man, but conforming to the image of Christ. At the risk of using a Christian cliche', I think perhaps asking the question, what would Jesus do, is a pretty good idea! I think holiness encompasses more than my finite mind can comprehend, but in the context of I Peter 1, holiness is generated by strong, holy thinking (verse13), and by abandoning our old lifestyle that did not reflect God (verse 14). It sounds so simple, but how much of what I think, say and do reflect true godliness and how much reflects patterns that have been established from childhood that perhaps are not godly, are unholy? At present, my spiritual quest is focused on this matter of holy living as dictated by God. I believe it will fall somewhere between careful conformation to man's religious rules and regulations and permissiveness in the name of liberty in Christ. I'm not convinced that the practice of true holiness even belongs on the same continuum with the two... God, I pray you would show me my heart as it compares to your standard of holiness.